Toby's Tantrum
by Nutmeggedya
Summary: Toby acts completely out of character and loses his marbles when Michael won't let him go to the beach on Beach Day.  Oneshot.


Disclaimer: Not mine.

Author's Note: I just had to write this quick one shot because, to me, the idea of Toby yelling is wicked refreshing. So, here's what may have happened on Beach Day if Toby had randomly plucked up some courage and acted _completely_ out of character.

**Toby's Tantrum**

_It's beach day! It's beach day! It's beach day! _

I chanted this little mantra to myself as I tidied up my desk. _It's beach day!_ Excitement – something I rarely felt at work – coursed through my body. Giddy, I poked around in my bag to make sure I had everything.

Towel? Check.

Book? Check.

Hat? On my head.

Sunscreen? Oops. Sunscreen…I had definitely brought some to work this morning…I always roasted like a marshmallow at the beach, being so fair and all…where was it, where was it?

Seeing as I had just cleaned the top of my desk, I didn't bother to search there. I ferreted through the drawers; no such luck. As a last resort, I stuck my head under my desk. Ah ha! Bingo!

I scooped the little blue bottle off the floor. Flinging my bag over my shoulder, I took a quick stop at the bathroom before traipsing into the main office.

"Anybody need sun block?" I toyed with the blue bottle as I pushed through the door. "I got SPF 30."

"Oh," Michael said.

As soon as he opened his mouth, some of the excitement drained from my body.

"You know what?"

Foreboding completely ousted the excitement.

"Ah…you're not going."

My heart plummeted into my stomach.

"It's beach day!" I pointed out unnecessarily.

"Yeah, I know. I'm sorry, Toby," Michael said insincerely. "We…um…somebody has to stay here."

The camera crew ushered Michael into his office for a quick talking head. I stayed rooted to the ground for a moment, stunned. Michael was obviously lying – his stutter and lame excuse gave him away.

_Why me?_ I thought to myself. _I'm a nice guy! Why does he hate me so much?!_

Dejected, I shuffled over to Pam's desk.

_Ah, Pam._

Why did she have to be so freaking gorgeous? With her fly away curls…and her bright eyes…and her adorable smile…she was so perfect, so warm, and so…unattainable. She would never fall for someone like me, a shy, balding divorcee when she could have so many other men. Stupid Jim….

"Hey," I said sadly, placing my pride and joy – my amazingly super fantastic SPF 30 sunscreen – onto the counter. "Want my sunscreen?"

"Oh! Great!" she said happily. "I forgot mine and I'm wearing a two piece."

A TWO PIECE? Michael was banning me from beach day when the hottest girl in the office was wearing a TWO PIECE?

"Uhhhg," I moaned quietly. I let my fist fall onto her desk.

"Thanks Toby!" she said gratefully. She flashed me her little smile, and I melted.

_I hate my life_, I groaned inwardly.

As I was walking away from reception, Michael came out of his office. He looked like an even bigger idiot than usual today, wearing an unbuttoned floral shirt. _He's wearing a shirt with pink flowers_, I thought, _but he's making fun of Oscar, who looks normal, for being gay...what an ass wipe…._

As Michael brushed by me without as much as a "hello" or an "excuse me," something inside me snapped. I just couldn't take any more. No more being ignored. No more being meek, quiet Toby. No more letting Michael walk all over me. All. Freaking. Done.

"Michael!" I yelped, turning on the spot.

The whole office went quiet as Michael faced me. I realized that no one had ever heard my raise my voice before. Anger suddenly bubbled up inside me, a broiling, red hot rage of the kind I hadn't felt since my ex-wife told me she was packing.

No one had ever heard me complain, had they? And yet, it's okay for them to come running to me to vent whenever they have a problem. Has anyone ever offered to listen to _my _feelings? Has anyone ever given a tiny rat's ass about _my _life? NO!

Michael sighed. "What is it, Toby?"

"I HAVE FEELINGS, TOO!" I roared.

I felt every single pair of eyes in the office (and the camera) bore into me. But the floodgates had been opened and the water was coming thick and fast, so everybody should either put on a snorkel or get the hell out of the way!

Michael had managed to look astonished at my nerve _and_ frustrated with me at the same time. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"I HAVE FEELINGS, TOO!" I repeated. "But no one _ever _considers my feelings, do they? NEVER! It's like I'm not even human! I'm just a big pair of ears! I'm surprised my mouth hasn't fallen off from disuse! I always have to listen to everyone else moan and whine and bitch and –"

Michael cut me off. "What the hell is wrong with you?"  
"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?" I bellowed, gesturing fiercely at Michael before spinning to confront the rest of the employees. "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU? WHY DON'T YOU APPRECIATE ME?

"All of you have come complaining to me in the past, _every single one of you_. Why haven't any of you returned the favor? Why? And I have a lot of good things to complain about! All of you complain about RANDOM CRAP!

"Kelly, for instance!" I quipped, and she started, dropping the sheaf of papers she was copying as I addressed her. "You vent at me about six times every day, and it's about meaningless stuff. GET YOUR NOSE OUT OF THE LIVES OF CELEBRITIES, AND TRY STICKING IT INTO THE LIFE OF SOMEONE WHO MATTERS!

"And Ryan!" The former temp stared at me, alarmed, from the supply shelf. "JUST DUMP HER ALREADY! ENOUGH OF THE BICKERING!

"And you, Andy, no one likes to hear you sing! NO ONE! So just STOP!

"And Karen. Open your eyes! Jim obviously doesn't love you, so you can stop coming to me with your Jim-problems. Can't you see he's desperately in love with Pam?"

Karen's eyes bugged out of her head, Jim's jaw dropped, and Pam hunkered down in her chair. I rounded on Pam.

"AND YOU!" I bellowed. "WHY CAN'T YOU SEE THAT I LOVE YOU!?!? TOO BUSY PINING AFTER A MAN WHO'S TAKEN?"

I took a step towards said man. "Jim. Not only do I sort of hate you for having such a good chance with Pam, but ENOUGH with the PRANKS! I have BOXES of complaints about you from Dwight. Do you realize how much that makes my life suck?

"And Dwight! Maybe if you ignored Jim's jokes and acted your age I WOULDN'T HAVE TO HEAR ABOUT EVERY SINGLE STUPID THING THAT HE DOES TO YOU!"

Slowly, I turned to face Michael. I glared at him maniacally, my lips pressed into a thin line. "And you," I hissed, taking a step towards him and brandishing my pointer finger at his chest. "YOU. WHY DO YOU HATE ME? Is it because I work for corporate and you don't? Is it because I usually bring the bad news? Well, I have to bring the bad news, Michael, because THAT'S MY JOB. SO SUCK IT!"

Spent, I dropped my finger and crossed my arms across my chest. My chest heaved as I felt my fury simmer down to mild anger. My face burned.

The silence that followed my outburst was tense. I looked around; most of the employees were agape. M&Ms were spilling from Kevin's open mouth. Everyone looked absolutely stunned. Finally, Pam spoke.

"Toby?" she said meekly, her voice quavering. I glared at her, and she gulped. "Um…your fly is unzipped."


End file.
